The bone monster’s grandma in a rocking chair lasers fired tidal waves of loud speakers that blaird the latest in new wave Muzak at Morgan, sending his bones into a paralizing state of terror. His eyes, brain, spleen, and lower intestines evacuated themselves out of the way before the real damage could be done. Morgan was now wondering why his internal organs, two that had slept with each other previously and one that had killed another, had chosen this precise time to abandon him in his time of need. “get the fuck back here!” he shouted, but then felt the tugging of his toungue pulling itself out of his mouth. He did the only thing a person with sentient organs could do, he filled out a organ donor card and flashed it to the sky.

“By the power of Gray skull, I HAVE THE POWER to donate your living asses to someone who actually wants you!” this seemed to do the trick, but not before the bone monster slammed Morgan down into the dirt with its sickeningly thick fingers comprised of backbones. “MORGAN!” Kim shrieked as she feared she was to be next on the bone monsters ground pounding list.

“Yeah?” he responded casually as the bone monster landed another hundred blows, Morgan simply standing up each time and brushing himself off calmly. “Doesn’t that hurt you!?” the blond haired woman screamed in frustration at what she was seeing.

“Only if I let it… I mean geez, this things got basic strength at best, even the Taco Bell Dog could kill it with a wag of its tail.” just then, The Taco Bell Dog erupted from the ground with the strength of three Taco Bell Dogs, creating a three foot crater all around it. “Hola,  me voy a orinar en el ahora y, a continuación …. Vas a morir!” it said with little respect for the bone monsters Victorian upbringing.

“see? whated i tell you!?” morgan said with a whiff of arrogance. That’s when things went south of the border, as Immigration came in a little green truck and snatched the Taco Bell Dog up by the scruff of his neck and carried him off. “Maldita sea! Malos tomarme la revancha próximo monstruo ósea tiempo!” it said through bared tooth and raised neck hair. Morgan thought he saw something a bit familiar about the critter, but he couldn’t be sure.

“Wait, wasn’t that Phil Harris?” he asked with little certainty. Meanwhile, the bone monster filled out a police report of vicious menacing from a three pound dog. Morgan snapped back to attention and centered himself below a hanging chandelier. “Why are you doing that?” Kim asked, almost burnt out and annoyed that nothing could possibly redeem the man’s actions.

“Trust me, you’ll understand soon enough. Nordafet, Antimo, get ready for transformation plan number seventeen!” Morgan said as a pudgy, unflatteringly ugly man in a thick leotard with the words ‘Too sexy for my crabs infested jock strap’ bedazzled across his chest moved a strobe light behind the Lost Wolf. Kim prepared herself for the worst. “Blitz Fang: zehn Millionen Winkeln des Todes!” he shouted with fury in his voice. The next thing she saw were hundreds of Emo Clouds gathering around the Lost Wolf as well as hundreds of mirrors angling themselves at hte bone monster.

“Har! You think a electric attacks going to have any effect on me! I’m a ground and fighting type!” The woman sat down as she knew this would eventually turn into a horridly made anime with lots of people in funny hats throwing red balls at the ground.

Morgan laughed, “I’m not going to attack you directly, I’m using Antimo’s ability of reversing the attacks type. What’s the opposite of lightning?” The bone monster shivered, the tendons that bound its body together seemingly losing their grip.

“No….NO!” “YES! I’M ATTACKING YOU WITH LIGHTNING’S OPPOSITE! DARKNING!”

Kim started to bang her head against a nearby rock. “Can’t… Take… This… Much… Longer!” she muttered to herself, cracking the rock a little more and deeper with each blow. Morgan used Nordafet as a club and started wailing on the bone monster, and the Emo Clouds started writing depressing poetry to the congressman in hopes that he could use their talents. the bone monster simply stood still, not knowing how to react. So he sat down next to Enigmatt and wrote an angry letter to his congressman about the state of the UPN. As it reached for the last stop in its letter, the Emo Clouds shot huge bolts of lightning with such anger, that they later went on to form the boy band “Emo Clouds” and sold quintuple platinum records. Which ended up killing four billion young men destined for greatness. Morgan sat down next to Enigmatt and the bone monster and wrote his local congressmen a letter proclaiming his love of snails. Kim screamed in rage and roared out her first hyper move.

 ”kaytsakits’ atam `tasy milion angles mahvan!” and ripped the bone monster apart with deadly accuracy. The Deom bones flew off in tidal waves of hellish splintering fire, and much to the surprise of Enigmatt, Morgan, the Arhem twins, Antimo, and Nordafet, as well as the stage hand, she roared out a number of deadly moves that caught Morgan off guard in the realest sense of the word. “Mahats’av i lurr mardaspan! Tsayr mekh SNKAYIN krem siravep! Tsaghki petals e apshets’uts’ich’ mahvan! K’vosot poezian khist k’nnadatut’yun e Cupid! Arrows e ansahman sunburst! Rushing uzhy yot’ zayrats’ats testicles! Rush e anali gorroz ark’ayazn! Growling vorot e kaytsakits’ Asttso nakhkin kiny: Sarsap’yeli sinus gerbnakvatsut’yun e palati khosnak!” instantly and without any actual good reason, their typewriters broke. Enigmatt stood up in anger, summoned his great sword, and used that to pick the dirt from his nails in protest. “I’m going home.” he said boorishly as he disappeared in a puff of red smoke.

Joseph and Aneeh both silently agreed that Joshua had reason to keep an eye on this woman. ‘You think she poses a threat now, dearest sister?” Joseph smugly thought, quite unaware that his sister had lovingly hired five billion snipers with earth shatteringly powerful, extremely accurate weapons, of such extreme levels of technological prowess, that he simply had to rip a fart, and solve a space time riddle cube, and five hundred billion hollow point bullets ripped, shredded, tore, and just in general splattered him across ten miles of rocky mountain pass.

“Did I really do the job that time?” Aneeh asked herself callously. She was disappointed when her brother reformed his body, cell by cell in a matter of seconds.

“Dearest sister, if I didn’t know any better, I would have said you were trying to kill your older brother! Do I truly bother you that much?” he asked jovially. She stuck her tounge out at him and sneered. “I would have much more preferred to be paired with Joshua rather than you.” she sighed, “That woman… she might have the potential the Chasm needs to spread the Golden Strands further through out Existence.” she took a breath and pulled out a huge, five hundred kiloton meteorite attached to several miles of chains, and pulled down hard and swung it this way and that. “So much so that you would have no choice but to submit to my will! Die!” Aneeh screeched, giggled, laughed, and spouted Tickle Me Elmo quotes as the meteorite broke into billions upon trillions of fragments and rained down upon the hapless brother who only smiled.

“One day my loving sister will stop killing me. Until that day… Viṣṇu kē krōdha kā āśīrvāda!” he called out calmly, the move did nothing but bestow a small burrito next to a bowl of ranch dressing upon Antimo’s face. The fragments sliced through Joseph like bullets through a Jello mold. Aneeh smiled until Antimo climbed up the cliff face with a mouth full of burrito, smacked her in the right breast and yelled at her to knock it off. She started whimpering to her brothers corpse while it healed.

But he shook his head. “Not this time little sister, you have to learn to fight your own battles. And besides, we have the Colossus of Darkness right behind us. Actually, he was the meteor you attacked me with not too long ago.” Joseph smiled until he recieved a spike through the throat. “The time of tomfoolery is over, we have been summoned by the Chasm!”  The Arhem twins vanished in warbles of fish guts and recycled nipple rings as Nordafet shook his head. “Now that the psycho and the zombie are gone, what now?”

Kim had reduced the rock she had been banging her head against to a pile of dust. She lifted her head out of the rubble and thought real hard about their next move. “I don’t know. To be honest, I have no fucking idea how the Hell I got he-” Morgan silenced her. He knew just exactly how she got here, it was the same way of how he got trapped in this Dimension. He had to sacrifice his waking world body to save those he wanted to protect. “I don’t know how to tell you this Kim; but I think your Waking Dimension body is dead.”

The news struck Kim down like the lightning attack did the bone monster. “How!? The last thing I remember before falling asleep, is going into this alley way with my boyfriend… and then he- he-” she couldn’t finish the thought because it was too painful to finish.

“It’s alright if you don’t want to talk about it. I understand perfectly well what you must’ve been through to get here. Just know that if you don’t wake up in the next four hours, then you truly are dead. Not only that,” the Lost Wolf said quietly, “But- you may have the same type of ability that I have.” She stood up and ran towards Morgan, only impeded by both Nordafet and Antimo. Her eyes welled up with tears of anger as she screamed at him. “Dead! DEAD!? YOU THINK I’M DEAD!? WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MATTER WITH YOU MORGAN!? IS THAT ALL YOU EVER THINK ABOUT? THE FINAL ACT!? THE CURTAIN CALL!? THE LAST MOMENTS OF OUR LIVES!? You’re still the fucked up pain in the ass you were in the university! You know that!? You think just because a person like me is here, that I might be dead!? What about dreaming? What about in a coma? Or passed out? I would really like to know what goes on through your head!” she raged at the Lost Wolf, who could do nothing but listen to her angry voice with a small shard of sadness.

“You really want to know?” he said when she fell to her knees and could take it no more, the tears in her eyes fall to the ground like heavy machine gun fire. Her sobs shook her body so much that even her gasps of air had little effect of calming her down. “You want to know what I really think about on a day to day basis, while I’m stuck in the insanity that is this Dimension?” he asked once more with a bit of heat in his voice as he steadily walked towards her. “Nordafet, Antimo, could you make yourselves scarce for a while?” the two protested their friends request, but in the end, the look in his eyes said it all. “Yeah… Just, don’t be too harsh on her…” Antimo suggested with a little wave of his hand. “Come on Nordafet, let’s go fight that ugly stage hand we saw earlier.”

Morgan waited for the duo to be out of sight before he knelt down in front of Kim. “I’ll tell you what is exactly going through my mind, right now. I won’t bullshit you or try to cheer you up Kimmy.” he lifted her chin so that her eyes met his, and she saw the stress he had gone through, the unreleased anger and regret he had within his mind that, more often than not, got him in trouble when he was in the Waking Dimension. “I think about saving Existence, about finding the rest of our little group, so that we have enough strength on hand for the coming fight, that horrid, bloody, war of a battle that will end all of this madness. I think about the Waking Dimension, and how I miss my family and friends, how I miss the sight of a blue sky that’s not a giant blueberry hovering trillions of miles away, or the scent of green grass that’s not just part of some jack offs nose hair. I miss the feeling of the warm sun on my skin, the warmth of a sun not hurled in my direction.”

Kim started to spring back, but he held onto her calmly. “I think that even if I mess up just one time in a fight because a move didn’t go right, or the Skeletal Angels didn’t quite hit the target, I think that it will all end because I messed up in the long run. because I’m a Lost Wolf, a loner in the wild of this place with no chains to bring me back down! I feel the hate of this place every morning when I wake up, and every night before I go to sleep. I think about Sarah, about how she must be feeling, about the university, about the world at that particular moment!” he told her with confidence in his voice she had never heard in the Waking Dimension. “And then I see your beautiful face, and I feel guilty about what i put you through, about all the things I must’ve put you through, and I feel dead inside because that’s the effect you have on me.” her eyes focused on his words, and looked around to see that he was right. “You only just got here this morning, and already this place has put you through more than your mind can handle. You know how I reacted the first time I got here? With fucking clarity of mind. I don’t know if I was one of the lucky ones or what, but I tried my damndest to figure things out.” she started to whimper again. “Oh just shut the fuck up Kim, just shut, the fuck up already. You think screaming out random things is going to make for an effective attack every time!?” Kim started to smile, and then freed her chin from his fingers  “NO! You have to focus it down to something powerful, deadly, fast and vast.” he paused for a minute to take a look at the Taco Bell Dog’s picture he received from immigration before they took him away. “I’ll train you, but then you have to be on your own. Just like I was.”

Mean while, Nordafet and Antimo had just finished tying the fat stage hands spine in a knot and kicked him off the edge of a cliff and into a pile of broken upward pointing glass. “Well… That took care of that.” the Deom stated with some happiness about the situation.

“Yeah, especially after he called your mom what he did.” his friend said coldly. “Oh that? Nah, she puts that on her Christmas card every year.”

Posted via email from {{http://twistedhauptansragepage.posterous.com}}

The bone monster’s grandma in a rocking chair lasers fired tidal waves of loud speakers that blaird the latest in new wave Muzak at Morgan, sending his bones into a paralizing state of terror. His eyes, brain, spleen, and lower intestines evacuated themselves out of the way before the real damag …

The bone monster’s grandma in a rocking chair lasers fired tidal waves of loud speakers that blaird the latest in new wave Muzak at Morgan, sending his bones into a paralizing state of terror. His eyes, brain, spleen, and lower intestines evacuated themselves out of the way before the real damage could be done. Morgan was now wondering why his internal organs, two that had slept with each other previously and one that had killed another, had chosen this precise time to abandon him in his time of need. “get the fuck back here!” he shouted, but then felt the tugging of his toungue pulling itself out of his mouth. He did the only thing a person with sentient organs could do, he filled out a organ donor card and flashed it to the sky.

“By the power of Gray skull, I HAVE THE POWER to donate your living asses to someone who actually wants you!” this seemed to do the trick, but not before the bone monster slammed Morgan down into the dirt with its sickeningly thick fingers comprised of backbones. “MORGAN!” Kim shrieked as she feared she was to be next on the bone monsters ground pounding list.

“Yeah?” he responded casually as the bone monster landed another hundred blows, Morgan simply standing up each time and brushing himself off calmly. “Doesn’t that hurt you!?” the blond haired woman screamed in frustration at what she was seeing.

“Only if I let it… I mean geez, this things got basic strength at best, even the Taco Bell Dog could kill it with a wag of its tail.” just then, The Taco Bell Dog erupted from the ground with the strength of three Taco Bell Dogs, creating a three foot crater all around it. “Hola,  me voy a orinar en el ahora y, a continuación …. Vas a morir!” it said with little respect for the bone monsters Victorian upbringing.

“see? whated i tell you!?” morgan said with a whiff of arrogance. That’s when things went south of the border, as Immigration came in a little green truck and snatched the Taco Bell Dog up by the scruff of his neck and carried him off. “Maldita sea! Malos tomarme la revancha próximo monstruo ósea tiempo!” it said through bared tooth and raised neck hair. Morgan thought he saw something a bit familiar about the critter, but he couldn’t be sure.

“Wait, wasn’t that Phil Harris?” he asked with little certainty. Meanwhile, the bone monster filled out a police report of vicious menacing from a three pound dog. Morgan snapped back to attention and centered himself below a hanging chandelier. “Why are you doing that?” Kim asked, almost burnt out and annoyed that nothing could possibly redeem the man’s actions.

“Trust me, you’ll understand soon enough. Nordafet, Antimo, get ready for transformation plan number seventeen!” Morgan said as a pudgy, unflatteringly ugly man in a thick leotard with the words ‘Too sexy for my crabs infested jock strap’ bedazzled across his chest moved a strobe light behind the Lost Wolf. Kim prepared herself for the worst. “Blitz Fang: zehn Millionen Winkeln des Todes!” he shouted with fury in his voice. The next thing she saw were hundreds of Emo Clouds gathering around the Lost Wolf as well as hundreds of mirrors angling themselves at hte bone monster.

“Har! You think a electric attacks going to have any effect on me! I’m a ground and fighting type!” The woman sat down as she knew this would eventually turn into a horridly made anime with lots of people in funny hats throwing red balls at the ground.

Morgan laughed, “I’m not going to attack you directly, I’m using Antimo’s ability of reversing the attacks type. What’s the opposite of lightning?” The bone monster shivered, the tendons that bound its body together seemingly losing their grip.

“No….NO!” “YES! I’M ATTACKING YOU WITH LIGHTNING’S OPPOSITE! DARKNING!”

Kim started to bang her head against a nearby rock. “Can’t… Take… This… Much… Longer!” she muttered to herself, cracking the rock a little more and deeper with each blow. Morgan used Nordafet as a club and started wailing on the bone monster, and the Emo Clouds started writing depressing poetry to the congressman in hopes that he could use their talents. the bone monster simply stood still, not knowing how to react. So he sat down next to Enigmatt and wrote an angry letter to his congressman about the state of the UPN. As it reached for the last stop in its letter, the Emo Clouds shot huge bolts of lightning with such anger, that they later went on to form the boy band “Emo Clouds” and sold quintuple platinum records. Which ended up killing four billion young men destined for greatness. Morgan sat down next to Enigmatt and the bone monster and wrote his local congressmen a letter proclaiming his love of snails. Kim screamed in rage and roared out her first hyper move.

 ”kaytsakits’ atam `tasy milion angles mahvan!” and ripped the bone monster apart with deadly accuracy. The Deom bones flew off in tidal waves of hellish splintering fire, and much to the surprise of Enigmatt, Morgan, the Arhem twins, Antimo, and Nordafet, as well as the stage hand, she roared out a number of deadly moves that caught Morgan off guard in the realest sense of the word. “Mahats’av i lurr mardaspan! Tsayr mekh SNKAYIN krem siravep! Tsaghki petals e apshets’uts’ich’ mahvan! K’vosot poezian khist k’nnadatut’yun e Cupid! Arrows e ansahman sunburst! Rushing uzhy yot’ zayrats’ats testicles! Rush e anali gorroz ark’ayazn! Growling vorot e kaytsakits’ Asttso nakhkin kiny: Sarsap’yeli sinus gerbnakvatsut’yun e palati khosnak!” instantly and without any actual good reason, their typewriters broke. Enigmatt stood up in anger, summoned his great sword, and used that to pick the dirt from his nails in protest. “I’m going home.” he said boorishly as he disappeared in a puff of red smoke.

Joseph and Aneeh both silently agreed that Joshua had reason to keep an eye on this woman. ‘You think she poses a threat now, dearest sister?” Joseph smugly thought, quite unaware that his sister had lovingly hired five billion snipers with earth shatteringly powerful, extremely accurate weapons, of such extreme levels of technological prowess, that he simply had to rip a fart, and solve a space time riddle cube, and five hundred billion hollow point bullets ripped, shredded, tore, and just in general splattered him across ten miles of rocky mountain pass.

“Did I really do the job that time?” Aneeh asked herself callously. She was disappointed when her brother reformed his body, cell by cell in a matter of seconds.

“Dearest sister, if I didn’t know any better, I would have said you were trying to kill your older brother! Do I truly bother you that much?” he asked jovially. She stuck her tounge out at him and sneered. “I would have much more preferred to be paired with Joshua rather than you.” she sighed, “That woman… she might have the potential the Chasm needs to spread the Golden Strands further through out Existence.” she took a breath and pulled out a huge, five hundred kiloton meteorite attached to several miles of chains, and pulled down hard and swung it this way and that. “So much so that you would have no choice but to submit to my will! Die!” Aneeh screeched, giggled, laughed, and spouted Tickle Me Elmo quotes as the meteorite broke into billions upon trillions of fragments and rained down upon the hapless brother who only smiled.

“One day my loving sister will stop killing me. Until that day… Viṣṇu kē krōdha kā āśīrvāda!” he called out calmly, the move did nothing but bestow a small burrito next to a bowl of ranch dressing upon Antimo’s face. The fragments sliced through Joseph like bullets through a Jello mold. Aneeh smiled until Antimo climbed up the cliff face with a mouth full of burrito, smacked her in the right breast and yelled at her to knock it off. She started whimpering to her brothers corpse while it healed.

But he shook his head. “Not this time little sister, you have to learn to fight your own battles. And besides, we have the Colossus of Darkness right behind us. Actually, he was the meteor you attacked me with not too long ago.” Joseph smiled until he recieved a spike through the throat. “The time of tomfoolery is over, we have been summoned by the Chasm!”  The Arhem twins vanished in warbles of fish guts and recycled nipple rings as Nordafet shook his head. “Now that the psycho and the zombie are gone, what now?”

Kim had reduced the rock she had been banging her head against to a pile of dust. She lifted her head out of the rubble and thought real hard about their next move. “I don’t know. To be honest, I have no fucking idea how the Hell I got he-” Morgan silenced her. He knew just exactly how she got here, it was the same way of how he got trapped in this Dimension. He had to sacrifice his waking world body to save those he wanted to protect. “I don’t know how to tell you this Kim; but I think your Waking Dimension body is dead.”

The news struck Kim down like the lightning attack did the bone monster. “How!? The last thing I remember before falling asleep, is going into this alley way with my boyfriend… and then he- he-” she couldn’t finish the thought because it was too painful to finish.

“It’s alright if you don’t want to talk about it. I understand perfectly well what you must’ve been through to get here. Just know that if you don’t wake up in the next four hours, then you truly are dead. Not only that,” the Lost Wolf said quietly, “But- you may have the same type of ability that I have.” She stood up and ran towards Morgan, only impeded by both Nordafet and Antimo. Her eyes welled up with tears of anger as she screamed at him. “Dead! DEAD!? YOU THINK I’M DEAD!? WHAT THE FUCK IS THE MATTER WITH YOU MORGAN!? IS THAT ALL YOU EVER THINK ABOUT? THE FINAL ACT!? THE CURTAIN CALL!? THE LAST MOMENTS OF OUR LIVES!? You’re still the fucked up pain in the ass you were in the university! You know that!? You think just because a person like me is here, that I might be dead!? What about dreaming? What about in a coma? Or passed out? I would really like to know what goes on through your head!” she raged at the Lost Wolf, who could do nothing but listen to her angry voice with a small shard of sadness.

“You really want to know?” he said when she fell to her knees and could take it no more, the tears in her eyes fall to the ground like heavy machine gun fire. Her sobs shook her body so much that even her gasps of air had little effect of calming her down. “You want to know what I really think about on a day to day basis, while I’m stuck in the insanity that is this Dimension?” he asked once more with a bit of heat in his voice as he steadily walked towards her. “Nordafet, Antimo, could you make yourselves scarce for a while?” the two protested their friends request, but in the end, the look in his eyes said it all. “Yeah… Just, don’t be too harsh on her…” Antimo suggested with a little wave of his hand. “Come on Nordafet, let’s go fight that ugly stage hand we saw earlier.”

Morgan waited for the duo to be out of sight before he knelt down in front of Kim. “I’ll tell you what is exactly going through my mind, right now. I won’t bullshit you or try to cheer you up Kimmy.” he lifted her chin so that her eyes met his, and she saw the stress he had gone through, the unreleased anger and regret he had within his mind that, more often than not, got him in trouble when he was in the Waking Dimension. “I think about saving Existence, about finding the rest of our little group, so that we have enough strength on hand for the coming fight, that horrid, bloody, war of a battle that will end all of this madness. I think about the Waking Dimension, and how I miss my family and friends, how I miss the sight of a blue sky that’s not a giant blueberry hovering trillions of miles away, or the scent of green grass that’s not just part of some jack offs nose hair. I miss the feeling of the warm sun on my skin, the warmth of a sun not hurled in my direction.”

Kim started to spring back, but he held onto her calmly. “I think that even if I mess up just one time in a fight because a move didn’t go right, or the Skeletal Angels didn’t quite hit the target, I think that it will all end because I messed up in the long run. because I’m a Lost Wolf, a loner in the wild of this place with no chains to bring me back down! I feel the hate of this place every morning when I wake up, and every night before I go to sleep. I think about Sarah, about how she must be feeling, about the university, about the world at that particular moment!” he told her with confidence in his voice she had never heard in the Waking Dimension. “And then I see your beautiful face, and I feel guilty about what i put you through, about all the things I must’ve put you through, and I feel dead inside because that’s the effect you have on me.” her eyes focused on his words, and looked around to see that he was right. “You only just got here this morning, and already this place has put you through more than your mind can handle. You know how I reacted the first time I got here? With fucking clarity of mind. I don’t know if I was one of the lucky ones or what, but I tried my damndest to figure things out.” she started to whimper again. “Oh just shut the fuck up Kim, just shut, the fuck up already. You think screaming out random things is going to make for an effective attack every time!?” Kim started to smile, and then freed her chin from his fingers  “NO! You have to focus it down to something powerful, deadly, fast and vast.” he paused for a minute to take a look at the Taco Bell Dog’s picture he received from immigration before they took him away. “I’ll train you, but then you have to be on your own. Just like I was.”

Mean while, Nordafet and Antimo had just finished tying the fat stage hands spine in a knot and kicked him off the edge of a cliff and into a pile of broken upward pointing glass. “Well… That took care of that.” the Deom stated with some happiness about the situation.

“Yeah, especially after he called your mom what he did.” his friend said coldly. “Oh that? Nah, she puts that on her Christmas card every year.”

Posted via email from {{http://twistedhauptansragepage.posterous.com}}

The bone monster’s grandma in a rocking chair lasers fired tidal waves of loud speakers that blaird the latest in new wave Muzak at Morgan, sending his bones into a paralizing state of terror. His eyes, brain, spleen, and lower intestines evacuated themselves out of the way before the real damag …

The bloody knight stopped for just a second, “You fight to exis-” a blinding flash of light and several seconds later, Barney Fife had decimated his opponent with ease. Knowing he would just end up on the other side in this travesty called war. “You know, you’re right… I don’t have an answer to your question, so what? Heh… Let them come forever more! Luchero existir…” he said calmly as he sat back down between the two barriers, that seemed more like crushing waves of insanity building up underneath him. “Let them come…”

Back in the newly formed Dream Dimension, thanks in part to the Chasm and the Colossus Of Darkness, Morgan, Kim, Nordefet, Antimo, and Elmer Fudd had been going hunting. Morgan knew the scenario right off the bat as he saw Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck arguing about what season it was. “It’s rabbit season!” Daffy exclaims, wildly gesturing with his hands towards the sign.

“No, it’s duck season!” Bugs calmly mimics back at the duck. Morgan, not wanting to waste anyone’s time, simply took a bow and arrow and with one bolt, nailed both the duck and the rabbit through the head into the trunk of a nearby tree.

“Oh the Warner Brothers aren’t going to like this one-” Elmer was interrupted as Antimo snapped his head off his neck and sucked out the innards. “Well, hows he taste?” Morgan asked mockingly.

Antimo grimaced, “Like fucking ink, how did you think it was going to taste like?” he paused for a minute and realized where they were. “It’s been a long time since we’ve been back here. Where it all started.” Antimo calmly proclaimed. Kim wondered what morgan’s other side meant until she vaguely remembered the dream she had half a year ago.

“You mean to say that it was all real?” she asked timidly. Morgan nodded. “Yeah. It was. Literally all Hell broke loose when the Beast was born. Trillions upon trillions of lives were lost in the five day fight against him.” the Lost Wolf placed a hand on the deep scar on his chest and held it there for a second.

“Well, it’s no use hanging around this pile any longer then we really have to. I don’t know what the Chasm means by restoring the Dream Dimension, but I doubt we’ll be having a good welcoming party… right?” Antimo smiled as he bent over to pick up a loose chunk of the Beast’s eye. “Right. Hey Morgan, something isn’t right here, come take a look.” While the Lost Wolf and Antimo were talking about the eye he had found, Kim and Nordafet explored the wasteland of shields, chest plates, swords, and Deom skeletons that were stacked one upon the other.

“How long do you think this is after the battle?” Kim asked Nordafet, who was busy scavenging the soldiers graveyard for usable weapons. “I don’t know, looks to be a few hours after Sarah and Morgan left the first time around. Deom corpses tend to decompose fairly quickly, so I wouldn’t be surprised in the least. But what’s the Chasm’s angle in restoring it to this early of a point?” 

The group didn’t have long to wait for the answer as hundreds of bones lifted from the ground and slammed together. First making the feet, then legs and waist, then torso and finally the arms, neck, hands, and head. “What the flying Hell is that supposed to be?” Morgan said quietly.

“I don’t know… but I’m kinda getting tired of all this fucking fighting every ten seconds.” Antimo retorted with a little bit of anger in his voice. Aneeh and Joseph watched from the top of the crater, witnessing what Joshua would have explained to be a time trap.

“So, little sister,” Joseph began with a slight hint of excitement in his voice, “Do you think this creature will pose a problem for them? I mean, they did just escape from the Chen bot and her loyal army of CBS lawyers.” Aneeh simply drew a shotgun out of midair and jammed the barrel down his throat up to the stock. There was a single three seconds where she just might not pull the trigger. The Arhem woman did it anyways, and after weighing the pros and cons of her next action, pulled it another ten times just to be on the safe side. “Don’t you be making jokes about CBS lawyers. Or Julie Chen. Hard to believe that she works for the Chasm of Non-existence. But I don’t think this minimonster will be much of a challenge for Morgan, much less Antimo or Nordafet.”

Joseph healed himself, and after readjusting his jaw bone back into place, thought outloud. “We know the true level of strength of the Lost Wolf, the Deom, and.. whatever Antimo is. I’m more concerned about that Kim woman. To be honest, I don’t think she’s of any concern to us.” he sighed and brushed the quickly growing hair out of his eyes, “So why would Joshua want to go after her? It’s not like Chasm is in desperate need of fashion ti-” Aneeh threw the shotgun away and pulled out a repeating triple layered crossbow and let loose the entire salvo on her immortal brother. “Joshua has his orders, as do we. Unfortunately for you, I am privy to violence against you.” aneeh smilled and chucked the weapon over her shoulder as her brother pulled out the bolts one by one.

“I’m not entirely sure you regained all your senses, since you were attacked by the flying Armadillo monsters. Why they went straight for your privates I will never know, but you seemed to get a kick out of it.” Aneeh was about to unload a salvo of cruise missiles on Joseph, but decided that their current adventure was more important. “I guess Joshua seems to think Kim poses a threat in the long run. We’ll just have to wait and see what she does before making any assumptions into the matter.” there was a small flash of light and Aneeh smiled. “Sarah… Why am I not surprised. How are-” sarah wasted no time in driving the business end of a icepick up into the back of Aneeh’s skull, bringing out her twin magnum gatling guns and blowing off her one time friends right arm, left leg, both eyes, ripping off her jaw, and carving a huge chunk out of her ribcage.

Joseph started to clap his hands in excitement but Sarah turned one of the guns onto him and he lost both hands for the moment.  ”OH COME ON!” he shouted in anger. “You have any idea how long it takes for these things to grow back properly? Now I’m going to have to reschedule that manicure the Chasm promised me!”

 Sarah wasn’t listening in the least, she kept both guns trained on the Arhem twins, knowing it would be a matter of time before she ran out of ammunition. ‘Come on Morgan, hurry up and get away from there!’ she thought urgently. Morgan was having his own trouble as the bone monsters finger nails turned into a battery of laser cannons, repeating crossbows, tommy guns, colt forty fives, and grandmothers in rocking chairs with sawed off shotguns.

 ”You took my pig!” they shouted at Morgan while they took aim. “I DON’T HAVE YOUR FUCKING PIG!”  he shouted back, annoyed at the prospect that yet again, he was going to have to defend himself against yet another false animal theft accusation by the McCoys.

Kim simply wished all this would stop.

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The bloody knight stopped for just a second, “You fight to exis-” a blinding flash of light and several seconds later, Barney Fife had decimated his opponent with ease. Knowing he would just end up on the other side in this travesty called war. “You know, you’re right… I don’t have an answer …

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The knight stood its ground as the Spider King charged forward, its massive mountain like legs tearing through the round, carving huge chunks of Reality out of the round and causing massive flows of fire to belch out in its wake. “I see that you no longer wish to fight with words, maybe I was …

The knight stopped dead in its tracks, and waited for his opppenent to finish up what he was doing. “So you fight not for valor nor destruction, but harbor great vengeance against both?” he said in an old English accent. “I can not, for my very soul, say that I disagree with your ideals, as I too tire of the fighting. I was once a proud King, loved by my subjects, my knights were at the very top of loyalty and bravery.”

The Black and White stringed tornado slammed onto the Puppet King, forming the frame for his creation. “My kingdom was all I ever cared about. I now realize what purgatory I must be in for my fate to switch between good and evil every time I am run through by anothers blade. I can understand a fellow King’s distress in this situation, believe me, I know your pain.”  the knight stood stead fast as he drew out the longer of the two great swords from his abdomen. Small roots strarted to grow outwards and wrap themselves around the Puppet Kings body in preparation for the final phase of the transformation.

“I was arrogant in thinking that I was infallible, so much so that I grew paranoid soon of anyone that made even the slightest of err and had them killed on the spot. It grieves me so every time I step out of that barrier. I lost my Queen when she coughed at me and in response I had seventeen knights and squire both run her through every conceivable direction.” Large redwood panels slammed into place as the Puppet King’s head, upper torso, arms and hands were encased in massive scythes arranged in the way that teeth are in a person’s mouth.

 ”Before we begin… as is inevitable our destiny. Let me ask you this. Why do you fight? If not valor, or destruction, then what? Is it a person? A place? A long forgotten memory? Do you fight for a singular purpose or many? You see, the reason I fought was simply to expand my kingdom, which covered eight tenths of the planet’s surface. I was a very strong warrior in my day, and I had taken the heads of giants with more strength than I. Do you know how i died?” The Puppet King’s mind was fused with that of the Titan’s bloody scythe spider as wires crammed into Barney Fife’s head and sealed the gaps in between.

 ”I had picked up my shield, and my sword, and I remember looking at my youngest son, Edmund, and noticing a gleam in his eye that I did not like. In my haste to end my mistakenly perceived threat, I fell out of the window, located several miles about the spiked moat. I remember thinking to myself the strangest thought in the world, the very question I have asked you. Why was I fighting? For what purpose did it truly serve me?”  The eight eyes of the spider puppet glowed red as it planted its heavily weighed down foot on the ground.

 ”I could not find an answer to that question. And a few seconds before I hit the ground, I saw edmund with his hand reaching out towards me, I think I found my answer, would you like to hear it? I know you’re itching for a fight. But would you like to hear my answer?” The spider puppet pawed at the ground and nodded its head.

 ”Very well then, I found, that I had been fighting to protect. Not for a goal, not for an ideal, not for anything grand. Just to protect. Anything I could. Thank you for hearing my tale. Now then, my fellow King, let us once more fight for out own answers to that question, why do we fight?”

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The knight stopped dead in its tracks, and waited for his opppenent to finish up what he was doing. “So you fight not for valor nor destruction, but harbor great vengeance against both?” he said in an old English accent. “I can not, for my very soul, say that I disagree with your ideals, as I t …

Morgan, Kim, Nordafet, Antimo, and for some reason Credion stood around, dumb founded at the pair of bicycles riding by. The bikes themselves were nothing more then two groups of midgets building a working model of a Tesla Coil, but the fact that the whole thing functioned as a bicycle simply amazed and bewildered Kim beyond belief. Morgan shrugged as the midget troupe sung about stoned prostitutes in high squeeky voices. Until, that is, the bottom most midget popped his heel on a thumb tack and deflated. The Tesla Coil, largely unfinished for Doctor Phils evil scheme to transform marshmallows into rabbits that laid grenade like eggs out of their ears.

“Somehow, I’m not understanding how any of this is possible! Just where are we!?” Kim shouted directly into Morgan’s ear, to which a tiny porcelean version of the titanic sank, causing Enigmatt to sit down at a nearby typewriter and write a letter to his congressman about the whole thing. The Tingion soon got bored and wandered off to a local pub and beat every stereotypical nineties action hero into dust for the fun of it. Morgan sat down at chairs foot and wondered for a moment where exactly they were for a while as well. The Reality of the Mind’s Eye had been consumed by the Golden Strands, and it’s Gaurdian for all he knew had been killed off by Joseph Arhem.

He was also aware that shortly after going through the portal out of the Singolarita Dimensionale, the Golden Strands devoured Caasi and turned her into the Dread Queen. But as to their current location, he was not sure at all. And then Pennywise the creepy clown hit him. “Hello John Steinbeck! I’ll eat your heart!” Morgan blinked for a few minutes and then shooed him off in the correct direction of the famous writer.

“Oh… Well, I’m sorry about that, me and Mr. Steinbeck had a two thirty appointment, and well… I’m lost.” the demonic clown told the Lost Wolf.
“You sure you don’t want to battle it out?” Pennywise continued, hoping for at least a little bit of a beatdown. “Trust me. You’d lose. I’m even cutting back nine hundred percent of my potential shooing power to not turn your atoms into jelly.” the man said calmly to the disappointed creature. Kim tried not to scream out of frustration at the complete and utter random things that had just happened in the last five minutes. And then a deep moaning voice erupted the air into a fiery bath of blood and death from which none of the 2011 Oscar winners could escape.

“Housegeusts are not allowed to shoo off Pennywise the clown! Nordafet, please come to the dairy room… STOP THAT!” it roared angrily as the deom was busy flicking toejam at a camera lens floating not one millimeter from his nose. “You stop that… and this aint Big Brother…” he retorted angrily as Julie Chen rose from the ground amidst the disfigured army of Production assistants, headless CBS Lawyers, and violently ill looking Illinios senators. She pointed a long spidery finger at the Deom, opened her mouth, and released terrors so horrifying, so evil, so degrading and mentally jarring, that Richard Simmons threw a Barbie themed birthday party.

“Okay. Why-” “Houseguest are not allowed to question the goddess Julie Chen’s finger poke of death!”

“All I did was-” “Nordafet! PLEASE, SHUT THE HELL UP!”

“Why?” “Houseguests are not allowed to question the Producers!”

“Production is not allowed talk to Deom of knightly stature!” “YOU DARE QUESTION THE VOICE OF BIG BROTHER!? HOW…. DARE YOU DEFY MY ORDERS PUNY MORTAL! TO THE HAVE NOT ROOM WITH YOUR SOUL!”

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Morgan, Kim, Nordafet, Antimo, and for some reason Credion stood around, dumb founded at the pair of bicycles riding by. The bikes themselves were nothing more then two groups of midgets building a working model of a Tesla Coil, but the fact that the whole thing functioned as a bicycle simply am …

“Hulle kan nie ver wees, soek die omtrek!” a squeky voice rang out against the dinner time rush of a giant death dealing McDonalds store. “WHAT!?” his second in command, who happened to be hard of hearing, and never understood anything his superior told him grunted.

“Hulle kan nie ver wees, soek die omtrek! Omtrek!” the squeaky voice bellowed again, hoping that just once in his short lifetime, the second in command would actually do as he was told. “Startrek!? I don’t know nothing about all that nerdy stuff except that Kirk would totally own Picard! He’d also bang him some green alien ass as well!” 

The African screamed in rage as his head burst into a lovely potriat of what Lindsey Lohan’s vagina feels at the after parties.The death dealing McDonalds store slammed a ten ton foot into the earth only twelve feet away from Morgan, Kim, Antimo, Nordafet, Caasi, the Black Syrup and the Golden sStrands. McDonalds didn’t stand a chance as it had, in one mighty step, crushed the dreams and hopes of ten thousand Nicks fans as well as the fans themselves.

“If you are Caasi… and not just some trick of the Chasm of Non-Existence, tell me something only my Wife would know!” Morgan commanded as the twin steel spikes jammed themselves through Caasi’s legs, and into the ground her. Her mind was in overdrive, she knew that this wasn’t her real form anymore. She knew that her true form of the Bloody Strands was twelve septillion times larger the the McDonalds death dealing store behind her.Yet, she felt as helpless and hapless as a Kids Choice Award winner.

“Well? We’re waiting, Blitzarmeggedon…” Morgan said with little emotion in his voice. The one remaining Skeletal Angel slowly rose from the ground beneath the dreams and hopes of the Nicks fans. “Y-you have a mole just beneath the tip of your chin.” Caasi said as she looked nervously to the Golden Strands and the Black Syrup for back up. The Golden Strands in all its wisdom and destructive capabilities did the only thing it could.

It called Miss Cleo. “She be cheatin’ on you wit that waiter, Darlin!”

 Then it located all the homes of every single Human, Insect, and Rodent that worked at Fox News Studios and stabbed them multiple times, and in a twist of hilarious fate, planted copies of OJ Simpson’s glove at all the houses and holes. Then blamed Tiger Woods. “How did that help anything at all!?” the Black Syrup asked angrily as he stabbed five people whose last name was Pinkerton.

 ”Felt like it would progress this to a massive fight somewhere along the line. Instead, I think I hear the Door of Existence cheering me on to kill off more useless sketch comedy bits.” it said in slurping tones.  Nordafet walked over and joined in the conversation, suddenly bored with whatever relationship issues Morgan was having. “Such as? Have you tried those Bachelor shows?” he yawned as he leaned onto the Black Syrup’s sticky shoulder.

Morgan thought about Caasi’s answer and felt his chin. “I don’t have a mole underneath my chin. Schreddern Dunkelheit  Flutwelle.”

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“Hulle kan nie ver wees, soek die omtrek!” a squeky voice rang out against the dinner time rush of a giant death dealing McDonalds store. “WHAT!?” his second in command, who happened to be hard of hearing, and never understood anything his superior told him grunted. “Hulle kan nie ver wees, so …

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